Sunday, July 18, 2010

Steady... steady...

Hey, time for another update!

Ok, so things had been looking quite dreary this time last week. Hospice is on-call now because Shayna has been in quite a bit of physical discomfort due to the immense growth of this ridiculously unnecessary mass that has refused to give up or give her any kind of relief since we found it. On the bright side, Shayna has also refused to give up and has shown a kind of strength and will to live that I have never seen before.

Last Friday, she was, in all honesty, teetering on the edge. Despite our efforts and our hope to see her pull through, last weekend tested us all with a very real fear that Shayna might no longer be with us. HOWEVER, she was able to, what I would consider miraculously, hold on to dear life as that very dark storm passed over. She's not out of the woods by any stretch of the imagination, but she was presented with the ultimate test of life or death and despite what the cancer was trying to accomplish, she held on tightly and she wouldn't let go.

Since last weekend, she has been able to sleep. The almost two months leading up to last Friday, as I mentioned before, were utterly restless for her. She was not sleeping until she had been awake for so long that her body would just shut down, and that would only last an hour if she was lucky. For about a week now, she has been able to get some actual rest; rest that her body has desperately needed for so long. Her appetite comes and goes and it has been difficult to get all of the necessary vitamin supplements and nutrients into her to help her fight this off. As of right now we are really focused on making sure she isn't in pain.

With the constant discomfort of a rapidly growing tumor collapsing a lung, pressing against the other as well as pushing up against her heart, and God knows what else it's doing in there, her threshold for pain has forced itself to increase. Her mind has been struggling to find a way to block out any of the discomfort that she possibly can. The problem is keeping the pain and discomfort she is feeling from breaching that threshold further. Despite the incredible power of the body and mind, it can only take so much.

She has really had no energy to interact with visitors. She's barely has the energy to communicate with me. With that being said, those of you curious as to whether or not you can stop by to see her, although I am sure she appreciates the thought, her sole concern right now is concentrating all of her efforts on overcoming this. She spends a lot of time resting. When she isn't sleeping, we're doing what we can to get her to eat or drink to provide her body with enough energy to continue fighting. Her current communication consists mainly of requests for necessities, expression of discomfort or pain, or just random thoughts that she says aloud. When she's fully conscious, she seems to be aware of where she is and what's going on although she has not wanted to talk with any of us about it.

That's really all I can share right now. Again, to anyone and everyone who has been praying for her and expressing a desire to help our family, we thank you. Despite the long road to recovery that she faces as long as she continues to keep up the fight, we all hope for a day when all of this is just a distant memory. We pray for the day that we can look back on this time, and instead of the current pain, terror, and sadness, we will be able to see the silver lining and find happiness, serenity, and peace. Remember, express the love you feel to those who matter to you. Do not dwell on the potential of losing a loved one, but please do your best to spend time with them. If you're reading this, you were blessed to be given the opportunity to do whatever you're doing today. Make it count.

1 comment:

  1. Jonah my thoughts and prayers continue to be with all of you!